February 19, 2013

Thoughts On Angry Mom . . .


This picture is a visual representation of what I was like yesterday.  I had what will go down in history as one of my finest parenting moments, wherein I totally lost my cool and bit the head off one of my children.

It was not awesome.  To be fair, the child was also not being awesome in any way, shape or form.  In fact, the child was being disrespectful, disobedient and outright defiant to my face regarding a clearly established rule in our household.

I am not at all accustomed to that kind of behavior from one of my children. It was totally out of the blue. I was clearly unprepared for how to deal with it, so I dealt very, very badly myself and consequently spend the rest of the day in an emotional and physical funk. So did the child.

I went to bed sad. But I woke up today feeling much better because I knew that today I could do better.  I have apologized to my child for my behavior. I have also followed through on all the consequences of the child’s behavior.

Parenting is tough. Parenting teens is really, really tough. I am going to make mistakes. I am going to learn from them. The next time I feel like exploding at one of my teenage children, I am going to count to ten or walk away and then come back and discuss/discipline with love, care and concern. I’ve tried the anger route. No one wins.

Just my random thoughts for the day. Oh, and this is what I woke up to, so I think God was telling me it could be a beautiful day if I let it.


PS. Hannie B. knows I’ve used this awesome picture. She loves it very much and thinks she is quite hilarious.


Apis Melliflora said...

Just what I needed to read today.

Let's put on our rosy sunrise glasses and run the parenting race with joy, purpose and patience.

Aiketa said...

I guess parenting is difficult, even more teens, but you did something really good: apologizing.

From my point of view as a daughter, I many times need the apologize of my mother whenever we argue over something. On the other hand, she feels she doesn't have to since she is the mom, but it's really important to me.

After pointing that out for her, she does it now when it's necessary. Fortunately, we don't argue that much nowadays.

P.S. Hannie B.'s photo is awesome, perfect to illustrate the situation.

P.S.2: This sunset is so so beautiful!!! Sure it will be a beuatiful day!

The Queen Vee said...

I can't think of any mother who hasn't had what she would consider a bad mothering moment on her part. I've had so many I've lost count. Your kind of bad mothering moment actually involved you trying to be a good mother. There are many bad mothers in this world who do a really terrible job because they simply aren't good mothers. You are a good, loving and concerned mother. You're children really don't realize how blessed they are to have you for a mom, hopefully some day they will.

christy said...

Glad to know such a great mom has bad parenting moments, too. I second the "parenting is tough" comment. No one can prepare you for how hard it is and how much time is spent worrying over whether we are doing it all right. I'm shocked every day at the tough decisions we have to make. May today be a better day.

AllisonK said...

If you've only had one angry mommy moment you are AMAZING! I have to apologize every single day. Just when I think I have something or someone figured out they throw me a curve ball. I'm sorry you are having a tough time right now. Sending my love!

Sue said...

I have a colossal parenting failure every couple of weeks. Some days we can keep it in perspective, "overall I'm a really good mother" and other days it feels like we're ruining our kids for good.