I was working on a project for my Hubby the other day that involves creating a large bulletin board at our church highlighting Eagle Scouts. I did an image search for some of the required merit badges then clicked over to paste a merit badge into my desktop publishing program. When I clicked back, the Boy Scout merit badge was gone and my entire computer screen was covered with a sexually explicit image.
I can’t even begin to tell you how upset this made me. Oliver was no more than two feet from me. I screamed and shut the computer off as quickly as possible. Then I waited for the Hubby to come home and told him what had happened. I was almost in tears.
We conctacted a man in our church congregation whose specialty lies in the area of computers, and specifically computer terrorism, internet predators and cyber crime. He came over last night and is running a series of tests and checks on the computer. It will be protected behind an iron wall when he’s done and I will feel much, much better.
But let me be clear about one thing:
I HATE PORNOGRAPHY MORE THAN JUST ABOUT ANYTHING ON THIS EARTH AND WILL NOT ALLOW IT TO DESTROY MY MARRIAGE, MY FAMILY OR MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY HEAVENLY FATHER AND JESUS CHRIST!!!!!
I know there are many people out there who think it’s no big deal – just a part of life, of growing up, of a relationship or even a marriage. They are WRONG.
I felt horrible for the rest of the day after seeing one explicit image. I could not get the image out of my head. I just felt myself in a really dark place.
I felt so sad and worried for my boys. If one image can do so much damage, imagine an addiction to such images, built up over years, damaging normal perceptions of love, intimacy and respect for the female body and mind.
I felt devastated for my daughter. What kind of chance does she stand to have a healthy body image and loving marriage when there are these kinds of images and expectations out there? I am crying right now just thinking about it.
I will do everything in my power to protect the innocence of my children from pornography. I am determined.