Well, that is a very good question. In fact, it’s a question I keep asking myself a lot lately. I think I’ve come up with a few answers:
1. We have four kids. They are all active and involved. This means I am tired. Real tired. The little boys are best fighting friends. This means I am breaking them up fifty times a day – which is too much considering RedDog doesn’t even get home from school until 4:00! I don’t see the big kids from six in the morning until six at night. But once they’re home, it’s cram packed with family dinner, homework, music practice, scripture study, catching up and then they’re off to bed because they get up at 5:30.
2. I am getting up at 5:30. This means I am tired. I’ve been trying to ease my bedtime forward from 11:00 to about 10:00 and I am failing miserably. I just want some time to myself in the evenings with my husband and my iPad and no dishes in the sink or laundry to fold. Ya know?
3. I have Owlie. This means I am tired. He is on full systems go right now. While he wasn’t ready educationally for Kindergarten, I think his little personality wishes there was school every day. I can’t ignore him, though I do expect him to have solo time. So we play, walk to the park, do puzzles together, bake yummy things, read books, journey to the library, and run errands. It makes me tired.
4. I am exercising every day. This means I am tired. I’d love to say I’ve lost a bunch of weight. I haven’t. I love food and that is why. But I have gotten a whole lot stronger, which I feel good about…when I’m not feeling super sore and really tired.
5. I am in a lonely place. This doesn’t make me tired as much as it makes me a bit down. With Ronalin gone (I know, I know, it’s been over a year) and my SIL Audrey recently moved to Utah, I am missing my best friendships. I am alone a lot or alone with a five year old a lot. I miss my girls I could just chat for hours with. It’s a new place for me and I feel uncomfortable in it.
6. We have some family trials right now. They make my heart heavy and my mind worry. I am trying to find comfort in the things I know will help – prayer, fasting, serving others, leaning on the Lord. But there is still stress and concern and a hope and desire that all will be right again soon. I hate seeing people I love go through tough times. It stinks.
So, that’s what’s going on. Still here. Still chugging along. Doing it while tired, but trying to recognize blessings and find happiness everyday. Hope you are well and doing the same!