January 6, 2014

What I Cannot Change …

samsilhouette

This picture is part of a failed Christmas gift I tried to make for the Hubby. I just ran out of time, did a sloppy job, and then hated the results.

Funnier than me trying to pull of a last minute Christmas miracle is how much I’ve looked at this picture and torn myself apart, scrutinizing every last detail.

Here are the things I cannot change: 

My nose. I’ve hated it since the first time another kid made fun of it in Fifth Grade. It’s not a small nose. I can fit a quarter in my nostril (my brother can fit three in his!). My mom always reminds me that it works great, so I shouldn’t complain. She’s right. It’s the one thing on my body that likes to run.

The age spots on my face. Oh, I did look into a cream from my dermatologist that would fade them, but it was over $100. I’m just too cheap for that fix! I keep reminding myself that these spots are the result of being able to enjoy a life oustide in the warm sun. I like to think of them as the royal family of my freckle kingdom.

The crows feet by my eyes.  They make me feel old. But, I have to remember that they are my laugh lines. They are the result of being married to a man who makes me laugh every single day and kids who do the funniest things.

The fact that I have no upper lip. Just a thin lippish thing that disappears the minute I smile. Nothing short of collagen (ew) or a fat lip from being elbowed by RedDog is going to plump that bad boy up. But I have to keep in mind that it’s still good for kissing Owlies, reluctant teenagers and hot Hubbies.

Now, you may look at this picture and think, “Stop it! There is nothing wrong with you! You are great!” And you would be right.

But what if I put a picture of YOU up? Would you be as kind to yourself? Or would you start pointing out the negative?

Here is what I can change: I can give myself a break. I can love myself and not beat myself up. I can stop continually pointing out my flaws, my failures and my insecurities. I can look for the good in myself. I can change my attitude about me. I can try, for one minute, to see myself as God sees me.

I am so tired of women being horrible to women. I am so tired of women being mean to themselves.

Will you try to give yourself a break this week? Will you think about something you’ve done well today?  Will you go one step further and tell me, here on this blog, something great about you?

Let’s make this change together, because you and me . . . we are AWESOME!

22 comments:

The Queen Vee said...

You are awesome, that's all.

The Queen Vee said...

You are also beautiful.

The Dragonfly said...

Queen Vee, you were supposed to tell me something great about YOU! So. I will help you: you are one of the most creative and generous people on the entire planet!

Amy Lynne said...

You are so right! Something good about me is I've gone back to the gym and I'm loving it. I cannot believe how much I missed it!

Have a great week sweet lady!

The Dragonfly said...

Amy Lynne, way to go on getting back to the gym! That is huge. I am trying to do workouts at home each day. I have my kids and Hubby helping me so it is fun!

AllisonK said...

love! love! love! You are so lovely!

The Dragonfly said...

AllisonK, something wonderful about you: your ability to deal eh deep into spiritual study and record keeping INSPIRES ME!

Sue said...

I am goofy. My kids' friends like me (or maybe they just think I'm wacko!)

I was thinking that your skin looks awesome and you have been TOTALLY rockin' those bangs! Your hair is sure getting long.

The Dragonfly said...

Sue, you are goofy and I love it! You are also an introspect or and I learn from your deep thinking.

Erin said...

I'm not a fan of my legs, but they have carried me through the worst days (and the best) and for that I am grateful!

Ronalin said...

So, I have a body that despite its imperfections has blessed me with 5 amazing children and I love it for that. Also after 5 kids, I can still run a couples miles without falling off my treadmill. (My jiggles are starting to not bother me so much either as I run even though they are a constant motivator ;)) BTW, you are simply beautiful sweet friend!

The Dragonfly said...

Erin, I don't love my legs either, but I have two to stand on and that's a good thing! Thanks for the reminder.

The Dragonfly said...

Ronalin, you are one of my mothering heroes. I love your five kid body!

Maclaine said...

I looked at your picture my thoughts were that you have a gorgeous neck, I'm jealous that you don't even have a hint of a double chin and you have a very festive sweater on. As you picked yourself apart I had to scroll up to see if I could see what you were pointing out. I didn't see it until you insisted and then I was like, "yeah, maybe I guess?" but that's not what I saw. Now I'm wondering why I never considered whether a quarter would fit in my nostril. You're beautiful and you look pretty too.

Kelli said...

I didn't see any of the things you pointed out either! I just saw a beautiful and inspiring person; a friend I'm grateful to have had the privilege to meet so many years ago. You still inspire me today. Every day, as a matter of fact. As for me, I'm finally taking the time to devour the scriptures the way I've always wanted to. I just love to study them.

Apis Melliflora said...

I've always thought my hands were stubby and mannish. But, in video footage, they appear more graceful and feminine. I think my hands are so interesting.

In terms of my face, I've never disliked it. But I came to LOVE it in 2008 when I discovered that it looked very much like those of a certain family I came to love very much.

Especially the face of my Dragonfly sister: kind, full of life and energy, and classically beautiful.

The Dragonfly said...

Maclaine, I'm sure it's something most people would never think of. My brother and I, well, we're weird. We've kind of made a game of what can we fit up our noses!

The Dragonfly said...

Kelli, Oh, you are as sweet as ever. I want to know all your scripture devouring tips and tricks!

Sue said...

Mandatory photo at the next Carlson reunion: All 4 kids with quarters up their noses!

Aiketa said...

I'm a loyal friend. And my smile (even though my almost non existent upper lip disappears when doing so and that my gums show) but I love when people tell me that they always picture me with a smile.

Awesome post Dragonfly and you are so beautiful!

P.S: hahahahha I never thought of trying what would fit in my nostril... but I guess this has something to do with having two brothers... I agree with Sue, you should share a photo!!! :)

Sue said...

Amelia says you look young. I was also noticing that your girls look pert and well proportioned in that sweater. ;)

TracyS. said...

I think it's a great picture of a beautiful woman. I couldn't see the flaws you pointed out.

I happen to like my smile. It may not be perfect, but it represents a full and happy heart.