I do not make this stuff up. It just happens. It happens to us. Lately it happens to us too much. But we are both alive to tell the story.
On Friday the Hubby and I had grand plans to head to a major league baseball game with tickets courtesy of my parents. We were excited! We love baseball! We love date nights! We love getting away from our darling children!
The Hubby rode his bike to work on Friday. He was expected home at 5:00. I ran out at 4:50 to get some bottled water to take to the game. He crashed at 4:55. His leg and behind took the brunt of the crash. We now call them Road Pizza. His bike was only slightly damaged but had a flat tire. Because I was not home when he called, he ended up walking the last mile home. My man was beaten and battered. Not a good start to our date night.
Fast forward about twenty minutes. Owlie is having a complete mental breakdown because he’s realized he is not going to the game with us. The Hubby is sitting in the car in the driveway waiting for me. I am tying up five loose ends, barking orders to Hannie B., and trying to contain my excitement because Yay! Date Night! I run out of the house through the garage, giving the Hubby the “Go, Go, Go” signal so Owlie doesn’t try to follow us. It’s then that I realize I’ve forgotten something on the kitchen counter. I quickly yell “Wait, I forgot something”, turn around and run.
In my mind I am thinking, I’ve got to make this fast or that poor baby is going to be additionally traumatized by me leaving twice. I’m also thinking, gosh, it’s a good thing my back feels so great, because I’m running like a track star!
Then it happened.
One second I was running. The next, I was not.
In what can only be explained as the perfect bringing together of random horrible events, the Hubby had already started closing the garage door at my “Go” signal, but had not had not yet registered to put it back up before I began running back inside.
It was coming down as I was going in. The garage door close lined me right in the forehead and I was flat on my back writhing in pain before either of us even knew what had happened.
You can laugh now.
But you need to know that at the time it was pretty bad. As in the Hubby thought I might be going to the hospital bad. As in my forehead, back and neck were JACKED UP bad. As in all I could do was lay there and bawl like a baby bad. And yes, as in America’s Funniest Home Videos Million Dollar Winner bad.
The Hubby likened it to watching me be hit by a line backer full force. I guess I really was running like a track star. I was bewildered and in pain. But darn it, I wanted to go on that date with my Hubby.
So I cried all the way to my parents. And I downed Aleve and muscle relaxers and prayed a little that my stupid body would stop all of its stupidness.
Today I have a gigantic red mark on my forehead to remind me of my awesomeness. And my pride will be bruised pretty badly for a while.
Two crashes in one night. It was the date night that almost wasn’t.
I hope you see me in your mind’s eye today running into the garage door over and over. I hope it puts a smile on your face or a giggle in your gut.
I’m still suffering in my back from it all, but man, the chili cheese fries at that ball park were delicious.